String Theory basically** says that for everything that happens in your life, every rock you trip over, everytime you take a cab instead of driving yourself, each bite of food you take, there are an infinite amount of other ways that moment could have happened. Each "other way" is a different "string" or dimension in which another Tori made a different decision and her life continued in a different direction than mine, everytime this other Tori makes a decision, another string or dimension is entered into and so forth. That's a ton of strings.
Who cares?
There is also a theory that I read in a fortune cookie a few years ago that told me- You are always exactly where you are supposed to be. I subscribe to my fortune cookie's wisdom. I know that no matter what happens or has happened, or will happen, it's not up to me- God is the piece of paper on which the line of my life has been drawn. He is in every single moment as every single moment is in Him, and He is in the past, present, future, whatever other dimensions of time someone could think of, He is there. One Way. One Truth. One Life. One String.
Wishing something had happened another way is useless. It happened. Not only can we not change it, but it happened for a reason. I know I'm not aimlessly, hopelessly floating around Africa. I feel such a beautiful purpose here in my community, and I know that many of my fellow PC volunteers feel the same way about theirs. Christmas in Kabale was incredible, the time I spent with my friends on Lake Bunyonyi was refreshing and relaxing, and although I'm back in Masindi earlier than I had planned, I know that it wasn't ultimately my decision, and I have no regrets.
I'm praying extra hard that my 2009 (my only full year in Uganda) will be challenging, successful, and fun! My resolutions are to be Hardworking, Understanding, and Humble. Yes, I realize that my year will be confusing since my resolutions spell out "Huh"? But what new thing isn't confusing? And what's the use in my trying to figure it all out when I could be spending my time having a full Runyoro conversation with a woman in the market, or showing a globe to my neighbor and having the children in my village point to me where we are on it? I would rather make a true personal connection with a Ugandan child than waste my time worrying about which steps to take when. I would rather love than fear.
We are always exactly where we're supposed to be. May we always strive for that place to be in the Lord's love.
God Bless You all from Masindi, Webale Noeli, and Happy New Year,
Tori
**(like, super basically- string theory talks way more about black holes, subatomic particles, and quantum mechanics than I could ever hope to understand)
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
1 comment:
Victoria,
Thanks for sharing your experiences. I spent six weeks this past summer in Northern Uganda and will be returning this summer. Reading your posts revives the memories of my own experiences and leaves me yearning to return sooner rather than later.
As they say in the north, "Apwoyo Matek!"
Matt Michelin
Post a Comment